The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

What Jack Says....

I saw this movie a little while back and I was not too impressed. I heard from a group of people that this movie was going to open my mind up and just simply fuck my brain. Perhaps that is why I was not impressed because it did neither of those things.

I guess this movie has a little bit of everything. It has mystery, Nazi's, emotionally broken characters, murders, and suspense. With that being said does all of that really make a good movie?

This movie has a very offensive rape scene that if I had known it was going to be there I probably never would not have seen it. It is as graphic as I have ever scene and I am emotionally wounded from it. I heard that they are adapting this into an American Version in which they are using the same actress, Noomi Rapace. The first thing that movie is going to be missing is this rape scene. There is no way America is going to let that in. I would have been better with it if I had felt it was absolutely necessary, but I didn't. I guess it makes sense if you were to use the original movie title from Sweden, Men Who Hate Women.

In any event the twist wasn't really all that hard to figure out and the end of this movie ran about 15 minutes too long. They closed it all up in a tiny little neat package and I would have been better off leaving a few things to my imagination. The worst part is they have not made not only one sequel to this but two. Really? What else do I need to know. I have no desire to keep this series going and if I do partake on the rest it will be because my DVR box blew up and I have seen everything on NetFlix. I don't see that happening. You?

I give this one a 6.

The Lovely Bones

What Jack Says.....

Like most other women I read the book prior to seeing the movie. This is the story of a girl who is raped and murdered by her neighbor and her family coping with her death as she watches them from her heaven.

I really did enjoy the book, but I was not so thrilled with the movie. The book punches you in the face in the first 10 pages and the movie lacked that. They seemed to have taken all the interesting character qualities out for the movie. The book was less about Susie Salmon being murdered and it was more about her family coping and moving on without her. That was so not the way the movie went down at all.

In the trailers they portrayed this movie as a suspenseful psychological thriller and the book isn't that way one bit. Susie spends the first half of the movie trying in cope with her death and trying to find a way to contact her living family. In the book she is pretty much fine with her death from the get go and she is more concerned that her family won't make it without her so she watches them.

Stanley Tucci was terrifying in every way so good job to that because he needed to be. Right when I was starting to see him as a good guy he goes and does this. I was really upset at the fact that they took the rape scene out of the movie. They don't even mention it in the movie at all and they play it off as if she is just simply murdered. I feel that this was an imperative piece of the puzzle and the story lacked because of it. I am not a fan of rape, but in this instance it was absolutely necessary to the story line.

I know that it is always tough when you adapt a book into a film, but sometimes it works. Delores Claiborne, The Shawshank Redemption and Stand By Me are all adaptations that worked. I realize that those are all Stephen King novels and most of his novels are eons better then their film adaptations. These just happen to be exceptions to the rule.

I just simply hoped that by putting Peter Jackson at the forefront of another piece of literature that he could give it some justice. I hate to say it Peter, but you failed me. I was so wrapped up in the fact that the movie was missing all novel's fantastic qualities, that I didn't even look at the directing. The corn field parts were probably the best parts, but they still felt like throw away scenes.

On a positive note, this was some of the best production design I have seen in a long time. Naomi Shohan gets the credit for this and I can't say that I am surprised. After doing the production design for such movies as American Beauty, Constantine and I am Legend I was delighted. The production design in American Beauty changed movies forever.

Overall, I wanted more from this movie. I hoped that with it being nearly 2 1/2 hours that they could capture even a morsel of the emotion and grief that the book had.

Overall I give this one a 4. Huge disappointment.

The Grapes of Wrath

What Jack Says....

This was yet another piece of classic cinema I was forced to watch for class. I had already seen the other 2 movies many times over so I was stuck with this one.

This movie follows the Joad family as they try to make to California to prosper during the depression.

I don't think that in any world I would have liked this movie. It was pretty depressing and a little long. Henry Fonda was great and I do see why he had such a lustrous career. I think he should stick to comedies like Yours Mine and Ours because man, that is a swell film.

Overall I give this one a 4.

Year One

What Jack Says....

Did I want this movie to be good? Yes. Was it good? No.

The biggest reason that this movie was so disappointing was that Harold Ramis is a comical genius. I can't even begin to analyze what went wrong with this film. There were some funny moments and perhaps if I were move versed on the bible stories I might have understood it better.

All the good lines went to Michael Cera which is fine with me. Believe me I love me some funny Jack Black, but it was nice to See Michael being funny. His comedy is effortless.

I will never ever watch this movie again. Yes, it was that bad.

I give this one a 2. Ouch!

Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel

What Jack Says....

Horrible, awfully, terrible, make it stop! Yes, this is possibly one of the worst movies I have ever seen. The first one wasn't really all that great, but they really messed this one up big time. I had such high hopes for the Chipette's. Sad. It was so bad I don't even want to talk about it. I would have shut if off if I could have. Believe me.

Do I really have to give this one a rating? I give is a 1.

Now, if you want to watch a good Alvin and the Chipmunks movie then watch the The Chipmunk Adventure. I loved this movie as a child and it still thrills me. I still want to be Britney.

I give this one a 9!

Jennifer's Body

What Jack Says.....

I can't even describe how excited I am to review this movie! I am as surprised as everyone else that this movie was actually good. I can't believe that every pre-pubescent boy in America wasn't nutting themselves over this movie. I am seriously shocked that this movie didn't get more press.

Why may you ask am I so surprised? Three things happened in this movie to make it amazing:

1. Megan Fox plays a Vampire, Zombie, blood sucking piece of awesomeness! She not only bites them, she rips their stomachs out and drinks their blood as if she were drinking from a stream.

2. Megan Fox traipses around in nearly nothing for more then half the movie. Even when she is wearing clothes they are pretty non-existent.

3. Girl on Girl action with Amanda Seyfried. What more could you ask for?

Really teenage boys of America? You couldn't throw a few extra bucks at this movie in the box office? I am shocked at you.

I really didn't know what I was getting into with this movie and as I recall the trailers didn't represent this as a horror film. This was certainly a campy cult type horror movie and there are not enough of those these days. Yes, it was predictable but the screenwriting more then made up for it. This was the sophomore debut for Diablo Cody's writing and I think she did a great job. If anyone was looking for another Juno script you won't get it. Not in this movie and not ever again. That was just pure genius and that only comes around once. This script was still fitting for the movie and I enjoyed it. 

Here's a little piece of trivia for everyone. The end song for this movie is "Violet" by Hole off of the Live Through This album. There is actually a song on this album called Jennifer's Body, but I figure they opted out of using it because of the lack of popularity.

I will probably get a swift slap in the face from every reviewer on the planet for this, but I give this one a very enthusiastic 9. Yep, a 9. Accept it.

Sunset Boulevard

What Jack Says....

This is another classic that I had to watch for class and I found it interesting. In no world did I love this movie nor did I hate it. I think that maybe if I had not had to watch it for class I might have enjoyed it a tad more.

It is the story of this crazy washed up actress that blackmails a writer to write a movie for her. It is slightly Great Expectations meets anything where Betty Davis is evil.

Will I watch this movie again? No probably not, but it is sort of one of those movies where once you see it once you never need to see it again.

I give this one a solid 4

Some Like It Hot

What Jack Says....

I had to watch Some Like It Hot for a class project and I will say that I didn't hate it. I actually quite enjoyed it. I have never been a huge fan of Marilyn Monroe's movies, but this one was a good one. I don't think that my generation realizes how unbelievably beautiful she really was. With the Megan Fox's and Jennifer Aniston's of the world being what is "in" right now, they just simply don't have a clue.

There is a manor is which she moves that makes her unlike anyone else. Yes, I was watching the movie, but she captivated me. I realize that when she fell she fell hard, but it is nice to know that there was a time where she was beautiful, talented, and on top.

Jack Lemon is hilarious. You find me something that he isn't wonderful in and I will check it out, but as of now there is nothing. This is my first go around with Tony Curtis and I will say he was just so so. I am sure he has done better work.

Overall I give this one a 6